


We should take a moment and know that Life has a Hopeful undertone

by TammyDKiryu



Series: My Blood [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adam Milligan Lives, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Post-Episode: s04e19 Jump the Shark, Post-Episode: s04e22 Lucifer Rising, Season/Series 05, i need to learn how to tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-22
Updated: 2019-10-22
Packaged: 2020-12-27 02:57:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21111551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TammyDKiryu/pseuds/TammyDKiryu
Summary: He gets it. He really does. But he feels like he is going to be alone again. That Dean is gonna leave him like John-(But Dean isn't like John.At all.)"And, I need someone to watch Sammy for me. I trust you, kid."





	We should take a moment and know that Life has a Hopeful undertone

**Author's Note:**

> _Shadows will scream that I'm alone _
> 
> _But I know we've made it this far, kid_
> 
> __
> 
> **[Migraine - TØP](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bs92ejAGLdw&list=OLAK5uy_nj8mnopxSbKSdq29njgos6tdYIPaLySPo&index=4&t=0s) **

He should be angry. _He is angry._ But he can really say anything about it when Dean is hugging him so tight that he can breathe.

(That's what happens when some demons kidnaped you, and you almost died for blood loss.)

"You know that I don't want to leave you, right kid?"

He nods because he can see it in Dean's face. How he really doesn't want to do it, but he knows he needs to. After all, the tension between Sam and Dean is really claustrophobic at the moment. The only thing he doesn't understand is why he has to go with Sam.

"He wants out and me, I had a huge mark on my back because of the angels. I don't... They don't know about you, and I really want to stay that way."

He gets it. He really does. But he feels like he is going to be alone again. That Dean is gonna leave him like John-

(But Dean isn't like John. _At all._)

"And, I need someone to watch Sammy for me. I trust you, kid."

That is another way to say that Dean doesn't trust Sam.

Not entirely, obviously, because he believes that he's going to be safe with him after all. He really wishes to know what is passing for Dean's head right now.

So he gives Dean another hug and says a _Be safe_. Dean nods.

"I have an angel looking over me, don't worry."

He remembers Castiel, and he tries to believe that that's enough.

He and Sam see Dean drive away.

Sam is tense and hears him sigh with resignation.

He looks at him, and the other is staring back.

"Sam-"

"I know."

Adam doesn't know what he means by that.

"I know you don't want to be with me. And I get it. Right now, I don't want to be with me either."

"It wasn't your fault."

"That's not what Dean thinks."

"He is mad because you choose a demon over him, not because you set free Lucifer. And nobody thought that one thing was tied to the other." he pauses, remembering something. "Well, maybe Castiel did."

"How do you know that?"

"Dean told me. Well, not really. I was kind of awake when Dean was screaming at Cas on the hospital."

Sam let out a laugh, a tired laugh, but it was something.

"You think... You think he would ever forgive me?"

He asks like he knew the answer. As if he knew Dean the same way as Sam does.

"I don't know. You tell me."

And Sam looks at him, making a painful expression but saying nothing. Hears him taking some air to his lungs before touching his shoulder and drag him to the other car.

* * *

They end up in an unknown town, with few people. He guesses, in the apocalypse, that is the best thing they can find.

He sends a text to Dean with their location, and even if Dean doesn't answer to that one specific text when he asks how he is doing, Dean answers right away with a '_Case with Cas. Funny thing happened. Talk later. BE SAFE._' so he guesses he isn't mad that he send it at all.

Sam is working, and he decides to find something to do too, and get money at of it. He ended taking dogs to walk. It could be worse.

One day, Sam just came and sat in front of him on the table and says:

"I know." Still, like he knows what that means.

He isn't Dean to know what Sam is referring to right away. He wants to say he is not a Winchester to know, but that would be a lie.

(And maybe the thought of that should have told him what that was about.)

"I know who you are," and Adam is still looking at him, waiting. "what are you to us." and that's-

"I don't-" he wants to deny, but he knows it is useless.

"How did you-?"

"I went to your house, remember?"

He does.

They end up in silence. Not really tense but not calm either.

Sam cleared his throat to say something else.

"Dean knows?"

"No." And Sam is looking at him strangely. "What?"

"If Dean doesn't know, why-?"

Is it really so weird that Dean acts like _that_ with him? He acts the same with Sam- and that's maybe it. That's why Sam thinks Dean knows. Because he already acts like a big brother to him, even without knowing.

He looks at Sam and knows that he is thinking the same thing.

"He really likes you."

"I really like him too."

Dean is the big brother he never knew he needed. 

* * *

He notices the obvious hunters around the street, and that makes him have a bad feeling about it, as Han Solo would say.

He sends a text to Sam (and one to Dean just because).

After leaving the last dog on its owner's house, he went to the bar, and Lindsey greets him with an awkward smile and tells him that this time Sam, or _Keith,_ was doing some checking in the inventory.

He went there, and Sam was doing what Lindsey said he was doing.

"Hey..."

"Hey."

"Thanks for the warning."

"Yeah, you're welcome."

"How did you know?"

"I guess it's easy when your brothers are hunters themselves to notice the obvious things."

And it's the first time he says it out loud.

Sam looks happy about it.

That night, Dean send him a text asking '_everything all right_?', Adam doesn't think much before send it a '_Yes.'_

* * *

He notices when Sam wakes up in the middle of the night because he too wakes up in the middle of the night sometimes.

(The nightmares were a common thing apparently.)

So when Sam turns on the light, he is already sitting to look at him, and Sam looks a wreck.

"Sam?"

Sam doesn't answer for a long time before letting out a tired sight.

"We have a problem."

* * *

He hears Sam talking with Dean on the phone, sounding anxious. He doesn't know what Dean is telling him back, but when the call ends, Sam looks hurt. 

He sits next to him, and Sam looks at him, kind of confused.

"I like you too, you know," and that makes Sam laugh before he makes a choking sound and begins to cry.

He isn't really good at given emotional support (his mom was better at that), but he tries, and Sam looks like that it is enough.

* * *

When Dean doesn't answer his text for that night, he knows something is wrong. He sends a text to Castiel because Dean made sure that he has his number for anything, and Castiel is calling him a second later.

"Adam."

"Castiel... Are you with Dean?"

Sam is in the bar. This time he had the night shift.

"No, but we are going to meet after he has some sleep. Why?"

"Is he ok?"

Cas doesn't answer right away.

"He has doubts about Sam."

"How so?"

"He thinks they are better apart."

He frowns because that supposed to be temporary but doesn't say anything about it when he remembers the reason he called.

"He didn't answer my text."

Cas makes a breathing sound.

"I would check on him. Do not worry," and then he hung up.

He doesn't know what happens, but he knows it was something bad when Dean decides to call Sam hours later, saying they should meet. Sam looks relief.

When they're traveling to the meeting point, Sam looks at him.

"Are you gonna tell him?"

He thinks for some time the answer because he never thought it was necessary but right now what they don't need are secrets between them.

"Do you think it's gonna change anything?"

"No," Sam says without a doubt.

So he just nods and waits to get where Dean is waiting for them.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know exactly what is this, but I like it...  
I just want my three boys to be brothers and be happy!!
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
